Pete's Songs in a Bottle 

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My Knickers Have Lost Their Elastic

(lyrics by Eric Presland)

my knickers have lost their elastic,
the wretched things keep falling down
you can see the good news through the holes in my trews
they cause fusses on busses on rides to town

my knickers have lost their elastic
they simply won't do as they're told
they just slide off my belly, they're worse than my telly
at losing their vertical hold

oh
nylon knickers, nylon knickers,
without you where would the world have been ?
from strawberry-pickers to anglican vicars,
we all wear knickers next to the skin

some comments I get are sarcastic
especially whenever Ilean
for a perishing draft blows right through fore and aft
and stops at all stations between

oh
nylon knickers, nylon knickers,
without you where would the world have been ?
from strawberry-pickers to anglican vicars,
we all wear knickers next to the skin

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